When I went inside the classroom, I would hear whispers like,
''hey, hey isn't that the freak, that doesn't care about celebritys?!''
''Yeah.. I heard she also always gives up on everything, she does.''
Another girl answered: ''What a loser, nobody wants to have anything to do with a freak like her. Don't cha think, she should just die like this?!''
The other girls looked nervously around them and whispered in a warning manner: ''Shhhh, she's looking at us, be quite! She might hear you.''
''But that's exactly what i want dear, she is just too deaf. I mean, I even need to scream!", her voice got louder and louder, her gaze arrogantly locked on my appereance.
It's not like, i aren't used to this kind of stuff already, so why do i even care?
I hid my face beneath my hair and locked my eyes at the ground. No one will notice like this, right? I mean that the tears, started streaming down my face. I just can't stop being emotional about, all of it, even though I hoped, that I could have it under controle, at least, after some time had passed....
I just gotta act like I aren't able, to hear a thing, but it's so hard without earphones.
A girl that also got bullied, once told me, that she wasn't able to ignore her bulliers at all, even though, she had headphones on. You know what dear? I don't have a phone at school, not a single thing to put into my ear and it's hell. You are so lucky girl, is what I would been thinking, because I didn't have anything like that, to ignore them, I mean.
My parents need me, even though they call me useless sometimes. They need me there, to work and help, inside and outside the house. One day, I wanna be someone, they can be proud of and can't do that, if i am dead right?!
So i will continue living on. For the day, for the next day and the day, after. Only looking forward, seeing what it gets me.
I might be hopeless and i also might be a freak, because i don't care about stuff like celebritys, i mean kyaaa? Urghs, it makes me wanna puke. Why the hell, do they even scream?! They are human too, aren't they? Why making them, to something like gods? I just don't get it.
My only task is to survive this day.
The school continued, but i just couldn't follow with the stuff, so i started drawing.
"Miss, would you stop what you are doing, right now?! We are in math lesson, not in art class."
I abruptly stopped what i was doing, even felt a bit dizzy, because i lost a massive amount of concentration. "Yeah", i said nervously.
"She was drawing in class again, pffft!" "Does she still not get it?", one of the girls arrogantly chuckled.
I just wanted her to shut up and tell her, what about you and your stupid phone?! But i couldn't talk, to anyone there, the air was thick and i felt like losing all my bite. Well, whatever not like i really care...
I spent the break alone, just like all the other days, sitting on the toilette, as i started crying. I hope some kind of miracle will happen...
Nothing new happened and the day, more or less continued smoothly. The school would end, like any other day...
At least that is, what i would been thinking.
Untill i bumped into him...