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LordSputnik
Honest Review Interesting format, the letters make it quite unique honestly. Wow does it need help... The Good: The format is unique in my opinion which is very hard to find on Webnovel. One can relate to the characters. The Bad: The grammar and spelling... was this typed up on a smartphone? So many grammar mistakes, capitalization errors, spelling errors, and the overall structure makes it painful to read. The storytelling method the author uses is fairly unique, but I find it would only attract a very select group of readers. (I personally just saw this on the forums and thought to give it a read) The story is almost non-existent which isn't always a bad thing, but I feel like it is lacking something. The Neutral: Keep writing, read more English novels that have good grammar, and your own grammar will improve naturally. You have something good going here, just don't let it go to waste by not being able to convey your ideas well.
Chapter 1: chapter 1 - when she first seen him
Sitting their in the bar with a couple of friends drinking the day away. we only just started drinking between each of use we had 3 cups of presecco not yet tipsy but almost their. the door of the pub opened and a couple of guys walked in but one stood out from the rest. his brown dark shirt spiked hair and his black jeans sitting nicely on his legs in a blue light shirt with his two top buttons undone, can't help myself but want to order another drink just to get a closer look however his mates where surrounding him but I was on the end of the sofa. I asked my mates if they would like a drink but the didn't finish their first they was too busy talking about their make up and shoes and nails however I was more satiflied with the handsome one at the bar. I quickly finished my drink but as I stood up I instantly needed a wee, I asked my mate if they needed a wee but yet boo of them wanted one they was o busy chatting so I went on my own. trying to get his attention I flicked my hair from my shoulder onto my back and walked to the toilet, i took my bag to patch up my make up and making sure I had my purse before I went to get a drink. Just as I was about to leave the toilets my mate walked in and started going on about the same guy I had my eye on so I had no option but to tell her to go for the other one I said simply that he seems more of a match for her as they were the same night and same hair colour I could of gone on for ever but in the end she agreed with me and changed her mind we both agree to get a drink after we finished as it was the only way to get closer to these heavenly guys.